Funny Mistranslations from around the Globe

Found on Indian and Chinese menus:


Deep fried fingers of my lady

Pork with fresh garbage

Three cute prawns suntanning on the rice

Dumpling stuffed with the ovary and digestive glands of a crab

Teppan Yaki - Before Your Cooked Right Eyes

Children soup

Strawberry crap

Dreaded veal cutlet with potatoes in cream

We serve dead shrimp on vegetables with a smile


Found on signs:


We serve people like you as good food!

Big crap sale today! Rush yourself here!

The shadiest cocktail bar in Bangkok

In a Swiss mountain inn: 'Special today -- no ice cream.'

On the menu of a Polish hotel: 'Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion.'

In the office of a Roman doctor: 'Specialist in women and other diseases.'

In a Tokyo bar: 'Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.'

In a Yugoslavian hotel: 'The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.'

In a Japanese hotel: 'You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.'

On the menu of a Swiss restaurant: 'Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.'

In a Bangkok dry cleaner's: 'Drop your trousers here for best results.'

Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand: 'Would you like to ride on your own ass?'

Outside a Hong Kong tailor shop: 'Ladies may have a fit upstairs.'

In a Rhodes tailor shop: 'Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation.'

In a Rome laundry: 'Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.'

In a Zurich hotel: 'Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.'

Soon Go Fatt (name of restaurant in china)



Here are some funny subtitles from Hong Kong Martial Art Movies:


“Fatty, you with your thick face have hurt my instep.”


* “You are too useless. And now I must beat you.”


* “You always use violence. I should’ve ordered glutinous rice chicken.”


* “Take my advice, or I’ll spank you without pants.”


* “Quiet or I’ll blow your throat up.”


* “Yah-hah, evil spider woman! I have captured you by the short rabbits and can now deliver you violently to your gynecologist for a thorough extermination.”


"I please your uterus. You kiss my toes. It’s fair."


* “Damn, I’ll burn you into a BBQ chicken!”


* “The bullets inside are very hot. Why do I feel so cold?”


* “I’ll fire aimlessly if you don’t come out!”


* “I am damn unsatisfied to be killed in this way.”


* “I threat you! I challenge you meet me on the roof tonight for a duet!”


* “I will kill you until you are dead from it!”